No one tells you how, after a while, the comments, the likes, the attention, it becomes vaporous and indistinct. It doesn’t take long before everything sounds the same and you’ve heard it all before—good and bad. My intention with this post is not to dissuade you from interacting with content, but this is just the reality that I have come to find when dealing with feedback online.
As a content creator I can honestly say that I LOVE the compliments. Really. Truly. But after a while, seeing so many so often, they almost become bland and tasteless. Unless someone takes the time to write a long heartfelt multi-paragraph comment, I skim over it. It’s not that I’m not appreciative, there’s just so much of it that I have to filter through what I choose to engage with.
In a brief aside about negative comments, those are in the minority for most content creators. But their sheer rarity is what makes them stand out to us the most, and why so many creators feel the need to “call out” or “address an issue” that really shouldn’t have been an issue in the first place if it was the minority. Now that may not always be the case. I’m specifically referring to successful creators who, in fact, receive more positive feedback than not. But oftentimes, they are the ones who get dragged down the most by anything “off script”.
And why is that? Is it because we are conditioned to think that we need a constant refrain of strangers singing our praises? That’s so bizarre the more you think about it. Historically, this was a problem only celebrities had to deal with. It was unique to them. Now it’s as if the average person you see at Walmart is going through the same “trials of fame”.
We are conditioned to think that we aren’t any good without the stream of compliments, but too many compliments over time can still make us feel inadequate. (I hate using the word feel but I have no better word at the moment). When you have too many compliments, they lose their meaning fast. You start to think of your “doing something wrong” because the few compliments you do receive “aren’t enough”. You’re not getting 200 comments like so-and-so is, therefore, you aren’t as good as so-and-so, because apparently, in our dulled minds, more=better. Yet, when we do hit the sweet spot and go viral, it only satisfies for a few days before all that engagement evaporates and then you’re seeking it all over.
Overexposure to anything is bad. The sun is good. We need it to be happy and healthy. But you don’t want to be out in the sun too long or you could get cancer. Sleep is good. You need it to function and reset your brain. But to always sleep isn’t good either. Moderation is the key. Unfortunately, when it comes to being a creator, the constant exposure to compliments simply nullifies any deeper meaning behind them. Then our brains, in turn, start to change and think that unless we are seeing the ebb and flow of positivity then we bemoan that we are not worthy!
Keep commenting, engaging, and doing whatever it is you do online. It’s not the consumers fault by any stretch. It’s a humanity problem that we all need to be mindful of when we put ourselves out there for the world to see. By putting out content, understand that the purpose of it should not be “because I want people to say good things about me and give me attention” (which is a major reason why people do it to start).
So what do you do as a content creator? After years of content creating myself, I realize that I’m never going to reach the ideal. It’s never going to be enough. I think we need to appreciate the compliments more, while also not letting them define us. You should be creating because you enjoy it, not because you need the attention. Now if you are creating because it’s your primary source of income that’s different and not what I’m talking about. I’m referring to the average everyday creator who does it as a hobby and puts too much stock into what strangers say about them online.
Remember there is a person with a soul behind those words. But also beware that many times there is not. AI chatbots generate many compliments to keep us engaged in creating, and to keep the algorithm flowing. Beware the bots!
All this to say, don’t let comments define you. Appreciate them, but don’t make that your goal for creating. And if you do engage with them, make it meaningful. Be genuine and caring. Start conversations. Forge new friendships. You won’t be able to do that with everyone. But put some thoughtfulness into your replies.
How we engage with content whether silently in our minds, or visibly with our words, can affect us on a deeper spiritual level. Create because you want to and engage with your audience for the same reason.